Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Oh, the Paradoxy

Paradoxy.

I don't even know if it's a word.

But, it is today. (thank you George W. Bush and all your strategery.)

I guess I could google it real quick, but I'm not into all that.

So, I changed the look of the blog, just to keep you all on your toes. I wish I could be super-savvy and somehow figure out how to customize the website and make it all super-cool and super-personal and you all would be super-impressed. But, alas, I can't find the time to do all the plain old regular things that I NEED to do, much less all the super stuff I WISH I could do.

Can I get a witness?

However, just to make a point, the new outlay IS a map, and the title of the blog IS about a road...

I'll take it. Game, set, match. (Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, I played tennis. And not very well. At all.)

Soooooooooo...I'm sure you're wondering when I'll get to the point, but I absolutely love mindless chatter blogging, and I don't do it nearly enough. I wish I was half as clever in real life as I am over written words.

Do you love that I just called myself a clever writer?

No...what I actually did was say that I was a more clever writer than I am in real-life. But that isn't saying much. I'm exceptionally dull in real life, and have moments when I nearly have stage-fright trying to come up with something interesting to say.

It's ridiculous.

But seriously, thank you for your patience.

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." -Romans 12:12

So, pray for me...

(Now...wait for it, because I'm about to tie my mindless chatter in with my actual point in a genius, yoda-type fashion.)

Paradoxy.

Look close at the verse again.

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." -Romans 12:12

It's slam full of the paradoxy.

God laid this verse on my heart after, well, what He would likely call a meltdown/temper tantrum of epic proportions that I had with Him a few months back.

Please tell me I'm not the only one who has the nerve to throw a fit to the Master and Creator of all things. Please tell me. Please. Right now. Tell me.

So, I pitched a fit...and He gave me a word. Which was very kind of Him considering the fit I was in the midst of.

In moments of extreme distress, where I feel little hope and no way out and I am on the verge of full panic, I remind myself (for the THOUSANDTH time) that my feelings DO NOT AND NEVER WILL equal reality.

Let's say it again...

REALITY.

Me and my feelings don't create reality. I don't invent truth. I don't make the rules.

Imagine that.

I know it seems like these things would be obvious, but I seem to have to remind myself of this seemingly basic truth an obnoxious amount.

You all have no idea how much I climb all over my own nerves.

So, anyway, I'm right in the middle of my fit, trying to convince myself that the world doesn't revolve around my head and the sky is actually NOT falling, and I ask God for a word. If I couldn't come up with some TRUTH, I needed (badly) for Him to shed some.

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." -Romans 12:12

Now, at first glance, I really dig this TRUTH. It talks about hope, for crying out loud.

I can get into some hope. I can get down for some hope. I will GET UP for some HOPE.

Ok, but keep reading.

There's gotta be some patience.

In affliction.

One more time...

Patience.

In affliction.

From me.

Oh, dear.

I'm just going to go ahead and say something here that I have thought for a long, long time. Here I go...

I think Jesus is a little bit sneaky.

Now, this is nothing I haven't said to Him directly, and , of course, I mean He is sneaky in only the most holy and good and perfect of ways.

But, sneaky nonetheless.

For instance. In this moment, He's telling me that I have permission to have HOPE...something that brings a much needed balm to my sore soul...

But, as He does this, He's also telling me, by the way, that there's gonna be some affliction in that hope, and He's expecting my patience.

Really?

Paradoxy.

Am I the only one who just wants something to be easy? I'm just being honest here. I look around and some things seem to come so easy to some people. And I seem to make everything so difficult...

Now, I could write a whole other blog entry about that last statement I made, and all the myriad of things that make it wrong, wrong, all wrong...

I know it's wrong. But I just wanted you to get my point.

Can't something just...be...easy?

So, I lamented the paradoxy for a while.

Hope...in affliction.

Joy...and patience.

And then, I begrudgingly remember that no great man or woman of God, or anything else for that matter, ever became anything without a fight, hard work, discipline, mind over matter, blood, sweat, and tears....

And some affliction and patience.

(Insert sigh.)

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." -Romans 12:12

So, I stopped my fit, got on my knees, thanked God for the word, straightened up my face, and got busy praying...and thanking, and trusting, and asking....

And, before you know it, I had some hope. Some real live HOPE.

He may be sneaky, but He sure knows what He's doing... ;) (And thank goodness, because I don't have a clue.) So, get joyful and hopeful. Be patient in your affliction...because the sky is NOT actually falling. And y'all be faithful in prayer. (For me. I clearly need it.)

But, seriously...

Ephraim, people. He always brings it home to Ephraim. Fruitful suffering.

Just like my Jesus. ;)

See you back here at Christmas...

Big hugs!

(and spell check just confirmed that paradoxy is, indeed, NOT a real word. There I go, making my own reality again...)


No comments:

Post a Comment